blurp
Today, an old flame crossed my mind. I was in an acapella rehearsal; we were working on the tune “Hide and Seek” by Imogen Heap. You’ve probably heard it before. I’m not sure why this particular memory came up but it did. I remembered one time in our few months of dating that he really knocked me off my feet. I remember thinking it was the best kiss ever. But in retrospect that’s not true. It can’t be the best kiss ever if your not still kissing that person, unless its the memory that counts? While thinking this my mind became more and more mixed up and quite frankly I felt angry. Angry that this thought lingers in my head and angry that I didn’t know how I felt about it. How do we let ourselves fall over and over again only to end up with scabbed knees and bruised elbows? I’m seeing someone else but the skeletons still like to come out of my closet. I feel like this memory overshadows any joy I could seek in anyone else because I know that in the end I’ll just be hurt. It sucks how someone who’s not apart of my life anymore can still influence it in the worst way possible. I wish this didn’t happen, I wish it wasn’t the case but now its all I can think about….I’ve finally been feeling happier then I was in January. But I’m beginning to digress. o well…..that’s all.